Day 8 of 100 Fears in 100 Days

Kelly Carlin 100 Fears in 100 Days, comedy, Fear of the Ordinary Comments

It’s one of those days where there feels like no room to add “walking through a fear” to my To Do List. I have writing to do. Some other shit. And then Bob and I are off to a taping of a friend’s new show, Paul Provenza’s Green Room, late afternoon.

So I ask myself, what is this 100 Fears in 100 Days really about? Is it always about an action? Could it also be about claiming? Shifting? Being with myself in a new way? I will meditate on this today.

Tonight there will be lots of fame and talent and funny in the room and a chance to mix in it. In my past, this was a recipe for feeling invisible. But so much has changed this year around all of this. I have had many opportunities to get comfortable with my own power and place in the world and see behind the curtain I constructed around all of this. I know that the only thing that matters to me is genuine connection to others. The rest is bullshit.

I no longer look at these events as places where I feel I have to prove something to the world about my worth. I only know that I love people – their humanity, their perspectives and their hearts and souls. I also love artists who have a wide audience – I am fascinated how their unique brand resonates for many. And I am especially excited when artists get together to talk amongst themselves about their work, life, the world. So tonight will be fun.

I know tonight will offer me a few opportunities to step over some fears.

A couple of updates:
Will get the MRI later this month.
And I got an email from the literary agent – she has read my essays and liked them a lot, and will read the memoir pages this week!!!
I think I just buried the headline. 🙂